exciting story # 9 King of excuses: what really happened

Me: My name is Femke and I'm a blogger.
You: Welcome Femke
Me: It has been 5 months, 2 weeks, 5 days and 3 hours since my last post
You: [ loud roaring applause]
Me: It's not that I didn't want to write, but I just couldn't find the time. Oh, okay, I did have the time but nothing really exciting happened. Or maybe exciting things did happen but I couldn't find the words to describe them to you. Or maybe that's a lousy excuse too.
The thing is: I just don't know why I haven't updated my blog on a regular basis but I promise you all to change my ways and post at least once every two weeks. How's that for a start?
You: It's a start, but no more than that.
Me: Okay, so what do I have to do to make you forgive me for not posting exciting stories the past few months?
You: You can start by giving us an update on your life over the past months.
Me: Okay, I can do that! Listen carefully, I shall blog this only once! There has been a new person in my life. She's soft, furry and cute and goes by the name Minoes. Minoes and I have been living together for the past 4 months and we are doing very well. The weirdest thing about having a cat is that you suddenly feel responsible for a living creature. For somebody who can't even manage to keep a cactus alive that's a big thing. But Minoes has been alive and kicking like crazy for the past months so I think I have found a hidden talent.
You: So you got a cat, how boring. Tell us something more exciting.
Me: Okay, let me see...... Ehm, I moved into another room.?!
You: Boring!!!
Me: What else?.....Ow, yeah. I got knocked up by an alien and we got engaged last week.
You: really?
Me: No.
You: okay, let's cut the crap. You have one last chance before we ignore your blog forever.
Me: But there's just nothing more to tell you!
You: So nothing really happened?
Me: Nothing worth mentioning.
You: Well, when do you think you can write us something exciting again?
Me: Let me see, ehm, maybe next week?
You: Sounds good to us.
Me: Thank you. And thank's for listening.
You: Anytime.....